Now we sit down together, enjoy some amazing food, and talk about our day. I find myself looking forward to dinner, instead of that constant wonder of, “What are we going to do tonight?” I wanted to do a dinner group to save time and money, but didn’t realize just how wonderful it would be to have that time set aside each night to be together.

I grew up in a not-so-typical-family. While everybody around was rushing to and fro, my parents were discussing what happened the previous day over a cup of tea. While everyone was twiddling with their Blackberrys, cellphones were a no-no inside the house not only because it was an intrusion to the quietness of the house but because they said it wasn’t very helpful to “real” communication. While everyone was gulping their dinner so fast their digestive system couldn’t keep up with them, my mom was slowly stirring the stew and minding the bread baking in the oven at the same time. We even had time to play Scrabble and read books together (TV during the weekdays was another no-no). When I moved out of the house with the thrilling thought of living independently, I was excited to try new things. I reveled on take out dinners. I slept late watching TV. About two weeks after that, I realized how bland take-out dinners were (for my taste buds anyway) and how noisy the TV can be sometimes. Simply put, I sorely missed home. I told my Dad about it and he wisely advised me on setting up a group with whom I can swap dinners with. I wasn’t sure how to do it so I browsed through the Internet and found out that it wasn’t such a novel idea after all. I decided to make my own group with a couple of new found friends I met in the apartment I was living in. What started out as an experiment for us became a trend in the apartment. Our neighbors eventually started to come to us asking for help on how to do this and that and asked for solutions to their group’s problems. Weary of being accosted even when we were in a hurry, we decided to sell a kit containing tips on how to start, what stores offered discounts for bulk buying nearby and even the shelf life of different foodstuff. A lot of people bought one and we used part of the proceeds to organize a small backyard party for the dinner groups in our area. My friends and I are still amazed at the turn of events. We also learned a lot from the experience. But the biggest benefits for me are having home cooked meals every night and becoming like sisters with my dinner group buddies.

Being a single mom isn’t an excuse not to join a dinner group. That’s what Gina believes, anyway. Just like most single moms, she had double jobs, hardly had time to grab a sandwich for breakfast, let alone cook dinner for her kids. But she had to slow down and rethink her priorities when her son was suspended from middle school. She realized that she had to fulfill her responsibilities as a mother first. She quit her graveyard job first and decided to spend more time with her sons. Their bonding consisted of eating microwave dinners in front of the TV. Then, her son’s guidance counselor told her about the benefits of eating together and suggested that she join a dinner group. Fortunately, our next door neighbor heard about Gina’s problem and decided to help her. She organized a dinner group and I was one of the members. Gina had a hard time getting used to cooking for a lot of people but she got the hang of it eventually. It was actually helping her a lot since she had to cook only once a week and opt to do something different on weekends. She cut short her kids’ TV time and they actually enjoyed eating together every night as a family and she even had time to go back to her second job. Her kid performed better in school after suspension and didn’t get into anymore trouble. As for me, being able to help out my neighbor was a delight. And in the process I also helped myself. So for single working moms out there, having a dinner group might actually be the solution to a lot of your problems. You’ll have more time on your hands. Time that can be spent in strengthening your relationship as a family. And if you ask Gina what she got from joining our dinner group she would say that it  was something that actually changed her life and her son’s future as well and helped her realize the value of her community.

Anne and I were worried that we weren’t as close to our kids as we should be anymore. They were growing up so fast and we didn’t want them to drift off without doing something about it. Together with three of our friends, who had the same problem in mind, we talked about what we could do and we decided that we should start off with having dinner every night, together with them. At first, we thought the idea was nice but it seemed unrealistic for us because we were all working moms. Then Anne came up with the idea of swapping dinner every night. That’s how our dinner group came about.

When we started our group, it was with the idea that we were the first ones to actually have this kind of group. We were giddy with excitement. It was like uncovering gold in your own backyard. But just like the latter, what to do after the discovery proved difficult. We made a schedule on who will cook on this particular day in a week but problems such as having chicken casserole every day and at times having none at all  (on the precept that they were just too tired or too busy) on some days began to surface. After a month, we were at our wits’ end and our friendship was in jeopardy. When we sat together for a meeting, we couldn’t even look each other in the eye! Then somebody came up with the idea of having a meal calendar.

Our life became decidedly easier after that. It was a huge sigh of relief to have a meal calendar. We felt so dumb thinking that we only thought of it after a month but then again you learn from your mistakes. We also had a laugh thinking about what happened during that time. The meal calendar truly is one very crucial and important tool before going ahead with having a dinner group!

Being a single dad is no picnic as everybody knows. Even though I am very busy working I had to find time for my son which was quite difficult because I had to work on graveyard shifts sometimes. For meals, I would stack on microwave foods on the fridge every week so it wouldn’t be too hard for both of us. Then my kid got really sick and the doctor cautioned me that it maybe because of something he ate and that I should watch what he eats. I felt guilty of course because I knew that the doctor was right. I tried my hand in cooking but the results left nothing to be desired because I was always in a hurry. Life took a turn for the better when a concerned friend of mine introduced me to the idea of a dinner group and invited me to join them because one of their members moved to another state. I was very hesitant at first because I was the only guy in the group of five but thankfully, they didn’t make a fuss about it. Even though I was a bit of a cheapskate  I bought some new stuff so I can actually learn how to cook edible food. It was a worthwhile investment though, I enjoyed cooking just once on weekdays plus my son was getting nutritious home cooked food. The latter, for me, is the greatest benefit in having a dinner group. Dinners were special since joining a group because we had time to talk and catch up on each others’ lives. My advice goes out to all the guys out there who like me are struggling with being a single parent: learning how to cook doesn’t make us less macho. If it’s for the good of your kid, go for it. I did and the rewards were just awesome.

My four year old daughter is a picky eater. I often get frustrated coaxing her into eating what I cook. I would scour cookbooks by the dozen and ask her what she wanted but what she usually picked out was something I didn’t want to cook for her. When we go out to eat, she would eat the greasiest, most processed and basically food that was devoid of any nutrition. But I was afraid that if I won’t let her eat those, she might become even thinner. I stumbled into the idea of a dinner group by chance. I was looking for recipes on the internet and I happened to pass by this site. The recipes looked great plus the calendar really gave me a clear idea on how to start organizing a dinner group. I called up my neighbors and told them about the plan. There were five of us (with one as the floater) who were willing to try it out and join the group. We printed out the calendar and the recipes for the first month. The internet indeed was very useful in our journey as a group. It helped us a lot in connecting with other dinner groups and in finding great recipes that would work just as well on cooking for many. But what I liked most about having a dinner group was cooking for 3 days every week instead of everyday. It meant less stress, and more time for my family. My neighbors and I also became closer from meeting every month and swapping what we call “dinner tales”. I had a particularly happy tale of course. My daughter now looks forward to dinner time and is not so picky anymore. I can now watch her enjoying healthy home cooked food everyday and I have my dinner group to thank for it. Kudos to this site also for introducing me to the concept of a dinner group!

My sister and I didn’t know how to cook. Our parents were great cooks though. They would usually be the ones cooking for big gatherings in our church. When both my sister and I moved to another state, we realized a little too late that we should have asked mom and pop to teach us how to cook since we missed home cooked meals sorely. She missed my mom’s tuna casserole and I really missed my dad’s superb stir fried vegetables with peanut sauce. For us, fast food and even gourmet restaurants just couldn’t replace our parents cooking. And we didn’t try cooking because as yuppies, “I don’t have time” was reason enough not to. One day, on a visit to my friend’s house I noticed how she had a lot of stuff in her fridge, in her cabinet and a calendar with names and dishes tacked on it. When she was about to explain why, the doorbell rang and someone gave her a Tupperware. She put it in the microwave and told me that she was a part of a dinner group. I didn’t refuse when she invited me for dinner and I tasted one of the best alfredo that night! My sister wasn’t too excited at first because she knew that we weren’t cooks at all. But armed with a cookbook and our trusty phone (to call our parents of course), we were motivated to learn how to cook. It was only a matter of time before we were able to replicate our parent’s dishes. When we went home, we were the ones doing the cooking already, to our family’s delight. Some folks even told us to enter into catering business! Its just great how having a dinner group made us appreciate the art of cooking. My sister and I have also become a lot closer because we spent a lot of time cooking together. And we’ve also realized that maybe, good cooks do run in the family.

I should have expected it. But unfortunately, I didn’t. When my husband and I moved from Malaysia to the States after staying there for almost 8 years, I had already gotten used to the slow paced life there.I had time to work yet I still had plenty of time for my family. I was also used to cooking meals for them everyday and it was not something that stressed me out or anything; it was part of the culture there. Then, when my husband was reassigned to the United States, I thought that it would be the same. But, of course, it wasn’t. The kids got busy with adjusting in a new country, my husband got busy, and teaching in a new school stressed me out. I only cooked for them once a week and usually it was Chinese or this and that take-out or TV dinners. I could sense that I was starting to become less of the mother that I should be and that saddened me. During a faculty meeting, a co-teacher of mine asked me if I belonged to any dinner group. I didn’t even know what that was that time and I told her that. She told me about dinner groups and invited me to one of their monthly sessions where they planned for the month’s menu. They asked me to join them since that time there were only 5 of them. I was hesitant at first, thinking that I couldn’t handle cooking for such a big group but eventually I decided to join. I didn’t know that it would bring such an impact in my life and I haven’t regretted that decision ever since. Admittedly, it was a challenge for me to cook and buy by the bulk at first. But I’ve gotten used to it. My family gets to taste really delicious and healthy food everyday and not just on weekdays. We had more time together. My husband looked less stressed. The kids also made new friends with the other kids in our dinner group. My dinner group has helped a lot in putting things into perspective and in changing the atmosphere in my family. If you are hesitant in joining or forming a dinner group, I encourage you not to. Do this for your family. Do this for yourself. And do it because Chinese take out gets tiring too.

Our dinner group is a life saver for the whole dinner experience at our house. My kids are 12, 10, 8 and 10mths, which translates to being a personal chauffeur from 3:30 to 7 or 8pm Mon through Thurs. I drive them to and from basketball, lacrosse, volleyball, violin, piano, scouts, young women, and activity days. I’m also the homework and music practice police/teacher in between driving. Preparing a meal around our crazy evening schedule often proved to be to big of a task. We would find something, but it was rarely a nice home cooked meal.

The nicest unexpected benefit of our dinner group is I actually am getting excited as a look through recipes to find mine for next month. When you only have to cook once a week for the group (plus weekends for your family) cooking actually becomes something fun to plan for! I have several recipes I want to try out on my famliy to test them out for the group and I’m actally having a hard time trying to work those in the weekends that are left before our next planning meeting.

Next unexpected benefit is I’m learning to cook for a big group and not get freaked out! I’m learning what quantities work. The food actually goes a lot further than you think it would. So as a side note–that 3mth and 1 year food supply we are all plugging away at–we probably have more than we think we do, especially if we continue our dinner groups through what ever event we are saving the food storage for. It sure makes the food go a long way!